new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
