I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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