scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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