My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize