In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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