that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
