I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Randomize
