i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
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