I hate your face
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Randomize
