i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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