so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
