Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
