we have pet lesbian snakes
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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