If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize
