Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
