I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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