do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
