i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
either way he was missing a nipple.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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