so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
