It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
