are you still at the devil's house?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
