And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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