youre lurking in front of me
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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