He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize