he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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