How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
