my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
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