I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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