my phone cant type all the emotion im having
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Randomize
