I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
