Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
