i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
