just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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