My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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