This dress was meant to end up on your floor
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
