Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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