Whod you bang
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I just cut my nipple shaving
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
