yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize