It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
