So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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