I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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