just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
