Girls should come with a carfax report
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
