; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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