I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
