well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I have post one night stand depression
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