Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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