this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Randomize
