i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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