My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Randomize
