whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
